


under my skin

by pooryorik



Category: Community (TV)
Genre: Alcohol, Bisexual Britta Perry, F/F, Feelings Realization, M/M, Not Beta Read, Pining, Sarcasm, Work In Progress, am i projecting onto jeff? maybe? shut up, because he has trust issues, jeff gets Defensive, jeff has to lure people under false pretenses to give him advice, jeff is so touch starved, pansexual jeff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-30
Updated: 2020-11-26
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:33:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,039
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27274990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pooryorik/pseuds/pooryorik
Summary: Jeff comes to a scary revelation, and seeks help.
Relationships: Abed Nadir/Jeff Winger, Annie Edison/Britta Perry
Comments: 7
Kudos: 57





	1. Chapter 1

my place now (sent november 29th 6:45 pm) 

Jeff sent the text knowing full well that Britta would assume he meant “for sex” but telling himself that he was simply requesting her presence. He didn’t phrase it like that knowing it would get her to him quickly and not in an hour like she would if he had sent that text in context, no sir.  
He needed help. And in this specific instance, he only had two options. Britta, or the Dean. So ultimately he had one option.  
A dozen loud knocks startled him. Seven minutes. Record time.  
He opened the door to Britta smirking back at him, a condom between two fingers in a way she must have thought was very cool.  
“Impeccable timing, Winger. I’ve had quite the shitty afternoon.” She let herself in around him and started taking off her jacket, and then her black tank top. Jeff remembered he needed to stop her.  
“Actually-”  
Britta turned with her top halfway off and raised an eyebrow before faltering at the expression on his face. She put everything back on. “What’s going on, Jeff?  
Jeff sucked in a long breath. He needed to go about this somewhat cautiously. “Ok. I need you to take what I’m about to say very- casually.”  
“Okay.”  
“I need you to know that I’m talking to you about this only because you’re my only option. Not because….” He almost considered not finishing his sentence, because a frankly terrifying look of glee was in Britta’s eye. “Not because you're a psychology major.” This was only partially true. The possibility that Britta could affirm he was as crazy as he felt was somewhat comforting.  
Britta grinned. “Jeff Winger. Did you lure me here so I could give you free therapy?” She was practically buzzing with excitement.  
“No!” Sort of. “No. Look. You’re gay.”  
“Bisexual.”  
“Whatever, Kinsey. I need your knowledge on a … personal matter. You’re Google. That’s it.”  
The mad glee in her face only increased as she let out a bark of laughter. “You lured me here to give you free GAY therapy! Amazing!” She stood up. “I’ll get the alcohol.”  
Jeff looked at his stained ceiling and prayed to God this was a dream. That this whole last week was a dream. He simultaneously thanked God that Britta wouldn’t tell anyone in the study group about this, because that necessitated her telling them why she came to his apartment in the first place..  
He really thanked God for that.  
Britta handed him a glass of Jack Daniels that he kept on the bottom shelf, and held a glass of red wine that he didn’t know he had. Had she stashed some in the kitchen for herself? Admittedly, Jeff never really looked in his cabinets.  
“So.”  
Jeff sucked his teeth. “So.”  
“You like a guy.”  
“God, who says like? What are we, fifteen? I am-attracted, to a...man. That's it.” Jeff knew he was being defensive.  
“So you like a guy”  
“Yeah.”  
Britta leaned back in the battered loveseat he kept in the corner of his badly lit living room and narrowed her eyes at him. “Who?”  
“That information is very classified.”  
Britta sighed and whined a little, breaking the therapist facade she was obviously trying to construct. “Jeffff. Don’t do that. I told you about Annie.”  
That was true. She had. But she had also told him about her crush with no (almost no) prompting, so he decided that counted for something.  
“There was no promise there! There wasn’t some pinky swear to tell you about whatever gay crush I had.” There also no idea that he would ever have one, but whatever.  
Britta’s ears pricked up at this, for some reason. “It’s a crush?”  
Jeff realized with a swell of panic that he had vowed to never use the term last year, openly mocking it as being too touchy-feely. He didn’t have feelings like that, he remembered thinking a little bitterly that night. He did now, apparently. Dear God.“Shut up.”  
Britta grinned and took a sip of wine. “Is it Rich?”  
“No! Why the hell would you think that?!” The implications of the question were appalling.  
“I dunno, Annie thought that since you hated him so much, maybe... “  
“I hate him because he’s deeply awful, Britta.”  
“We had a bet on it for a while,” she said quietly, shrugging. Jesus Christ.  
“No, it isn’t Rich.” Did he have a thing for Rich? Sure, he was attractive, but in this horrifying, artificial way that only amplified the man’s terribleness. Something in the back of Jeff’s mind dimly pointed out that maybe he wasn’t supposed to have opinions on men’s attractiveness, but this thing was obviously wrong and stupid.  
“Jeff, seriously. I can’t help in any real way unless I know.”  
Something inside of him crumbled at the realization that he needed Britta’s help badly enough to reveal things to her, and he buried his face in his hands. Jeff did not like being this out of control. It felt...gross. He mumbled it, hoping this would all go away. “adhwehd.”  
Britta even sounded like she was holding back laughter. “What was that, Jeff?”  
He snapped. “Abed!” He looked up at her to see a grin that faded when she saw his expression.  
“You’re scared.” She said it quietly, like a simple fact.  
Jeff took a long swig of the whiskey and leaned back, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I came to Britta Perry for help, didn’t I?” Annie probably would’ve gotten offended at that. Britta only sighed. She did understand him, at least.  
“Tell me how it started.” Since his dignity was utterly and completely lost at this point, he did. He told her how he had initially assumed his affection for Abed was just him being his favorite, like he had heard Pierce call Annie. He told her how he had always found him strangely attractive but always brushed it off. He told her how, during the heist to steal their project back from Professor Grundamm, Abed (while fully in character as Danny Ocean) had cupped his jaw with a cool hand to study his face, to “see if he had the guts” (to do what, who knew). He told her how that had made him forget how to breathe properly for a good five minutes.  
“And I’m an adult, so I was able to put two and two together at that point.”  
Britta nodded slowly, clicking her tongue. “You sure it wasn’t just the character? Because the same thing happened to Annie-”  
“I’m sure.” It made too many things make sense. Too many fleeting thoughts, feelings, all that sappy shit. Jeff realized with disgust that he had been pining. Unconsciously. For months.  
“Okay then... What do you want from me? Do you wanna ask him out?”  
Jeff scoffed and rolled his eyes. “How? He’d think I lost it. And Jesus, he’s either straight or he and Troy have been doing it since they met. No. I want to know what this makes me.”  
Britta shrugged. “Bi? That’s what I’d say.”  
Why was this so hard to explain? “But I don’t- like- men.” Did he? “I just… I just like Abed.”  
“Then maybe you’re pansexual.” Jeff looked at her incredulously.  
“No! It’s a real thing. Just means you don’t care about someone’s gender.”  
That was sort of accurate, actually. He paused. “Ok.” That’s okay. That works.  
Britta stood up with an empty glass. “You’re gonna have to do something, though.” She started to walk toward the kitchen. Jeff followed her- “No I do not. There is absolutely, no reason-” He broke off when Britta paused and turned back to him, eyebrows raised. Right. Abed’s sixth sense. It was useful, occasionally. He had gotten Just Neil and Vicki together. Britta laughed a little.  
“He knew I liked Annie before I did. You think he’s not gonna notice you pine after him?”  
Jeff groaned as he gave his glass to her to top up. “God, you’re right.” He took a large swallow.  
“Just ask him to dinner, or something. You think it’ll ruin anything? It’s Abed. He’ll barely falter.”  
It’ll ruin my chances. But she was right. But, he could not let Britta be right for more than two minutes. “You really feel qualified to give dating advice? Madame Pining After Annie Edison Is My Only Skill?” He laughed as Britta punched his arm. “Shut up.” She noticed his oven clock and swallowed the rest of her wine in one, impressive gulp. “Shit- I have to meet her, actually. Math tutoring.”  
Jeff laughed more. “You’re so whipped.”  
“I hate you.” She paused. “We’ll make a pact actually. You ask out Abed by the end of the year. I will.. ask Annie if she’s straight.”  
“You will ask out Annie. Equity, Perry.”  
Britta whined. “Fine. Oh- When are you gonna tell the group?”  
“Tell them what?”  
“Oh, you know- your new queer discovery.”  
Jeff stopped in his tracks as they walked to the door. “Oh. Never.”  
“Oh come onnn,” Britta tugged on his arm. “At least Peirce. He hasn’t gotten a win in a while.”  
Jeff held back laughter. “It is his birthday in a few months, isn’t it.” He unlocked the door for Britta as she pulled him into a hug. “What-”  
“I’m very proud of you.”  
He forgot wine drunk Britta was affectionate. “Call a cab.”  
“Yeah, yeah. End of the year?” She held out her hand in a very businesslike manner. What the hell- Jeff took it.


	2. Electric Boogaloo

After a few too many whiskeys, a Star Wars prequel (why not) and a text conversation with Britta Jeff went to bed secure in the knowledge that at least he had a solution to all this. He was gonna try his best with Abed and if it failed, it failed. Ce la vie.  
Jeff woke up the following morning with a pounding headache secure in the knowledge that he must’ve lost his mind. He was not going to tell Abed anything.  
A text conversation with Britta- what did he say? What stupid thing did he say? He took out his phone from his nightstand.

B- Im not going to be able to do this without motivation.  
money?  
B- Sure. Make it a bet?  
alrght. 500?  
B- Jesus. U sure?  
sure as the sun shines  
B- U drunk?  
only a lil  
B- Its a deal then. Prepare to pay my rent haha  
right back at u

Jeff sighed and flopped back onto his back. Britta really should get better at ascertaining people’s sobriety. Wasn’t she a bartender someplace? It didn’t matter. He would tell Britta that he was drunk enough to have forgotten what they were talking about and she would back off the money. Right? She had to.  
“No.” Britta leveled his gaze in the hall outside her stats class, arms folded.  
“No?! Are you psychotic? I was drunk!” Jeff squeezed her shoulder enough to make her cringe as he guided her to the edge of the hall in order to whisper-shout at her better. She batted his hand away with a flail that was a little dramatic.  
“Drunk words are sober thoughts, Jeff. You need this.” He hated her sometimes. She was resolute in this- he could see it in her face.  
“Where’d you learn that? Psych? Your professor lied to you. Drunk words are drunk words and you shouldn’t hold five hundred dollars on them.” He hissed the last words. Five hundred. The hell was he thinking?  
“I learned it from life, if you must know. Anyway, calm down. You don’t even know if I’ll hold you to it.” She began to walk away with a stupid smirk on her face. “You’ll just have to make sure I can’t”.  
“You’re not gonna hold me to it at all. You’re bluffing.” He started to half-shout over the din of the hall as she was getting away.  
“Yeah, like that money won’t pay my rent!” With that, Britta disappeared. Jeff stood in the center of the hall, midday traffic flowing around him. He shook with anger because she had somehow, some way, won. If this was Annie he would work on the assumption that she would never hold him to it, but Britta was scrappy. He knew that this wasn’t below her. “Damnit.”  
Jeff was surprised he was barely anxious to see the study group again. He kept discovering, over and over again, that his feelings had not changed. Only his knowledge had.  
He let himself acknowledge things now, that was different. Like Abed’s hands, or eyes, or odd, crushingly rare smiles. The only thing of note was that everything felt startlingly familiar. He knew it all already.  
He played Jeff Winger, and maybe Abed noticed him looking now and again, but he never said anything. Jeff couldn’t shake the feeling that he knew, though.  
\---  
A week and a half later Britta knew she could do it. The cards were all in place; her stats final was around the corner, so she got Annie for another “study” session (though they both knew it was tutoring). She could do it, and she was not going to tell herself she couldn’t because then she wouldn’t. She had motivation now, even, because she knew that Jeff would never do what he had to without some damn material incentive.  
“Just ask her to dinner.” Just ask her to dinner and then Britta’d have her answer and this gaping, stupid hole in her heart will learn how to close up.  
She barely survived the drive to the apartment building. She didn’t know it, but she hadn’t made a single turn signal; and additionally she had gotten in about four near-misses on the way. She parked in the church lot across the street, taking up two half spots and gripped the wheel until her knuckles were white.  
“You are going to do this. You’re going to go in there, and you’re going to stop being such a stupid baby, and you’re going to ask her to dinner. Okay.”  
She turned off her car. “Okay.”  
Against all odds, she made it to the apartment and after getting a Bandaid and some Neosporin for her trip over the curb in front Annie and Britta got to work in Annie’s room. It was actually the way Britta preferred it, even though Annie had fought Abed for rights to the kitchen table (which was littered currently with a detailed Kickpuncher storyboard). She had lost.  
They “worked” for about forty five minutes. Britta watched Annie in utter terror, while she occasionally said something about z-stats or critical values which Britta pretended to write down. Annie eventually put down her pencil on her notebook. “We can come back to this if you want.”  
“What?”  
“You don’t seem very focused, Britta, is all and I was thinking we could take a short break and come back-”  
“Do you wanna go to dinner?” It just spilled out of her. She resisted the urge to clap her hand over her mouth and braced herself for the aftermath; staring intently at the vague, abandoned scribble of the a-value formula in her lap.  
Annie paused. “ I guess so- it’s a little early but it won’t be hard to talk Abed into Chinese. He’s been watching Gilmore Girls lately.”  
Britta turned her head and was utterly confused until she realized Annie had misunderstood her. She shook herself and pressed her eyes closed. “No... no I didn’t mean right now. I meant later. “ When Annie still looked confused she weakly added “Without Abed.”.  
“Britta… What are you saying?” Oh God, she looked terrified- Britta’s voice only got quieter.  
“I wanna go to dinner with you. As not friends and not casual. As a date….thing.” She rubbed her hand across her face and added in a rush- “But if you want we can also forget this ever happened and order Chinese with Abed. That sounds good too.”  
Annie was silent for a long moment. Her face was expressionless. “You date girls?”  
“Yeah…I do.” Britta was a little startled she didn’t know. She had never stated it outright, but even Shirley had cornered her for a “talk” about lesbian’s hypercommitment and the stability that married life “between a man and a woman” had “blessed her with”.  
Annie finally, blessedly made eye contact and Britta was caught in those stupidly huge irises. “Okay.”  
“Okay?” Britta had one hundred percent prepared herself for rejection. She felt a little euphoric.  
“You’re going to take me someplace nicer than Senor Kevin’s, though. And we’re going to dress nice. Because we’re going to do this right.”  
Britta grinned. “Okay.” She started when Annie continued to stare at her. “Oh! Saturday at seven?”  
Annie grinned and Britta thought she might die. “Gladly.”  
Annie stood up and handed her the rest of her notes. “Just go and look these over. I- I’ve got some things to think about.”  
“Oh- yeah, definitely.” She stood in front of the door and was caught in a moment full of a tense something- where she nearly leaned in, before Annie pecked her on the cheek and pushed her out the bedroom door.  
“Abed! Unlock the door for her-” Her words were quickly muffled by the closing door.  
Abed got up from his work and nodded at it, even though to Britta it was nearly incoherent in it’s complexity. He walked her to the door.  
“You finally did it. Good job.” He struggled to get the chain lock loose.  
“Thanks. For a lot. If you didn’t say anything I never would’ve tried.”  
“Don’t tell Annie I heard. She keeps forgetting how thin her wall is and I’d rather her not be quieter.”  
Britta thought he had dropped the topic until she turned from the hall to say goodbye.  
“Congrats, Britta. It’ll make a fun plotline. That and-” he seemed to be remembering something someone told him. “I’m happy that you’re happy.”  
Britta dimly wondered if that was a Troy or Annie quote as she smiled at him. “Me too, dude.” Abed nodded quickly and closed the door.  
Britta took out her phone in the hall. Abed had reminded her. 

Jeff received a text.  
B: Just got a date: you’ll never guess who ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> someone asked for britta asking out annie to be included- s/o to them because that shook me out of writer's block. hope ya'll enjoyed and of course, it's not done. please comment, i love them dearly <3\. 
> 
> i should probably say now i don't write sexytimes. consider me an Austen of fanfic. i'm here for the dialogue. next chapter should be more jeff-centric, though god knows how long it'll take. i do have an ending in mind though so it's just a cause of Connecting Events.

**Author's Note:**

> so idk why this ship won't leave my brain, since trobed is objectively better lol. if anyone wants it I do have a part two in mind. just lemme know. i love Conflicted Jeff and writing britta's and his dynamic.


End file.
